An accident waiting to happen

Today (actually, it was over a week ago but Halloween has got me BUSY!) I drove the kids to school. I pulled out of the school parking lot and happily switched from the Jonas Brothers to my favorite AM talk radio station. I was tooling along in my p.j.'s and engrossed in a discussion on credit default swaps when a personalized license plate caught my attention. And it wasn't one of the obvious ones like MOMEBUS, either. Innnnteresting.

I missed some of the letters as the car sped by. Frustrated, I fixed my gaze on the image of the license plate in my rear view mirror. I was intrigued and wanted to get the letters committed to memory. But then I had to slam on the breaks to keep from rear ending the car that had stopped abruptly in front of me. After I caught my breath I said a quick prayer of thanksgiving for the fact that I had not plowed into someone while driving around in my p.j.s and obsessing over license plates. No one would have been hurt as I wasn't going fast at all, but can you imagine me trying to explain how it happened while standing there in my p.j.'s (I know, I know. Maybe I should learn something from this p.j business.)?! That's the kind of stupidity that haunts you for all of eternity.

And then I got annoyed. This is the second time in the last couple weeks that I have almost caused an accident. Last time I was cruising down the highway at a cool 55 m.p.h. I was not in my p.j.'s. I caught movement out of the corner of the eye, and turned my head slightly to locate the source. Hanging from the ceiling of my car about 6 inches from my face was a ginormous spider. Seriously.



Now I am not normally bothered by spiders. But having it right there in my face? Ack. I freaked out, swatted at it, and watched in slow motion as it fell from it's tenuous string of silk and landed right on my chest. At this point I am shrieking, and swerving, and smacking myself with all of my might. I think I squashed it but I couldn't actually see it, so I kept smacking and added some foot stomping for good measure. I wasn't taking any chances that it had fallen on the floor, and was preparing an assault on my legs. Fortunately, no one else was on the road. I had certainly done a poor job of staying in my lane, and I was down to about 35 m.p.h. by the time I finished my freak-out and got my foot back on the pedal.

And thank goodness no one else was in the car. It's bad enough when life throws a zinger. Most of the time I respond appropriately. But when I don't the last thing I need is a witness....