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Wednesday, September 9, 2009

There's always the bus

I'm still reeling from the impact of having the kids on different schedules. Rachel is embarking upon her third week of school, and the others are just two short weeks away from their first break. The kids seem to be handling it fine, but me? I think I ran into myself at the intersection of crazy and busy. I may or may not have hit my head.

I try to present an optimistic, focus-on-the-positive kind of attitude to the kids. I try to be a good role model. Unfortunately some of my modeling must come across like acting, and I'm guessing I'm not a contender for an Academy Award. At nearly 12 years of age Rachel has become a master at seeing through my, um, baloney and getting an accurate read on my more honest opinions.

***
The other day I'd waited in the carpool line for half an hour, picked up Rachel, and the two of us were waiting in the next carpool line to pick up her three sisters. I was trying to resist the urge to repeatedly smash my forehead into the steering wheel as I sat roasting, again, in the hellishly humid heat that can be part and parcel of a North Carolina summer. Rachel appeared oblivious to the stagnant air and blazing sunshine as she breathed a little sigh of contentment and said, "This being-on-different-schedules-thing might not be so bad." I brushed at the sweat trickling down the side of my face, and tried not to roll my eyes as I waited for her to finish. I was hot and cranky and not in the mood for contentment and happiness. And I had a feeling she was getting ready to take a verbal poke at me. She grinned knowingly as she delivered the punchline that she knew that I knew was coming:

"Yeah, the different schedules might actually be the best thing for our family. (pause) We actually get along really well when we're not around each other all the time."

Remember I said I got into an accident with myself and that I might have hit my head? Well now I'm certain that I did. And I must have hit it hard.

Had I been in my right mind she would totally have been walking home.

52 comments:

confused homemaker said...

A budding comedian, eh?

♥ Braja said...

Budding comedian *and* budding long distance walker :))

Tammy Howard said...

Oh dear...

Grant said...

Yeah, you show her. A real parent wouldn't allow happiness to prevail, not in their presence anyway.

Lindy said...

I love it when the kids make me laugh.

My stepson (14) is always cracking jokes...the good kind and I find myself laughing out loud a lot.

I also use it as a ploy...more times than not, he'll get busted for something as he delivering his punchline. :)

Pippa said...

Gotta love her (cos if you didn't she would be walking!)

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

I think she needs a swat across the head. Seriously. :-)

Tsquared417 said...

She's hilarious. Takes after her Mom.

Gibby said...

Hahahahahahahahaa!! What is worse? The fact that she said it, or the fact that it might be true? At least in our house, that is!

ymK said...

I understand not being in the mood for happiness and contentment, when cranky.
That kid of yours is hilarious!

M-Cat said...

Well done Rachel. And the sad/funny part, is that it's prolly true huh??

Kristina P. said...

I've been saying that about my FIL and step-mom, for years. I think the fact that he is gone for work all week, and is only home on the weekends, is what saves their marriage.

blueviolet said...

She is so obviously your daughter! LOL!

TKW said...

Huh....wonder where she gets THAT wit from?

Kathy B! said...

Alright alll you smart aleck commenteers... I am a pinnacle of patience and good humor. I am not sarcastic. Nope. Not at all.

You should be ashamed of yourselves :)

beth said...

haha! as they say...out of the mouths of babes...hope the schedule eases up a little soon!

JC said...

How old is she ?
My D started up with her version of what's wrong with her family, when she was in 6th grade.

I'd ask how her day was ... after driving 45 mins one way .. to pick her up at her new private school .. I would be told that she didn't feel like answering questions & to just drive.

One time I did pull over and let her out and drive up the street. I turned around & opened the door & told her to get in & to be polite this time.

That was the start of her teenage years ...

Danielle said...

Umm, did you expect different. She is your daughter! :) I love it.

Rick and Monique Elgersma said...

We didn't dig that hard when we were kids did we?

the ungourmet said...

HA!

I sometimes pray for Monday to come because I think my husband and I get along better when we aren't together for 2 days straight. :0)

parentingBYdummies said...

Funny, we are the same way. All super nice and sweet on each other when we are apart. Lucky us!

The Blonde Duck said...

Out of the mouth of babes!

Grand Pooba said...

funny, but OH SO TRUE!

Jen said...

Nice.

i am the diva said...

booyah!

Kim said...

I'm fairly convinced you've just described what Hell will be like: an unending car pool lane, where obnoxious, clueless parents keep cutting in front of you and causing backups while they take forever to load their kids' backpacks and hug their kids and chitchat to the driver next to them, while you sit sweating like a pig in your car. You'll probably have to go to the bathroom really bad. And there'll be a demon in the backseat tormenting you with wisecracks.

for a different kind of girl said...

She's learning some important life lessons, huh? Distance makes the heart grow fonder and all that? Ha!

Seriously, I planned to go to Target this morning. THIS MORNING! At 8:30 a.m., after I got my youngest son on the bus. It's 12:50 p.m., now and Target is just a pipe dream. What I'm saying is I have no ability to carry out a routine, let alone have kids on different routines and schedules, so good on you, friend. Good on you!

Pam said...

Seriously, I think Rachel is a genius! I've noticed the exact same thing about my family. We do get along better the fewer of us that are actually together. Sad, but true!

~Thought's By Dena~ said...

one day you will all laugh about this....seriously

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

Funny girl :) I think there's some truth to it though..

K said...

I can't even imagine two schedules. Good luck!

Glad the girls seem to be taking it well at least.

Susie said...

As I read this, I kept thinking..."oh child...do not go there! not now! Your mom is so close to the edge":-)Did she push you over or are you in your happy place now? Hee, hee, hee:-0

Suzy said...

Did you read about the woman who got tired of waiting in carpool lanes and wasting gas? So she takes her horse instead and the principal won't release HER kid and calls the police. I think it happened down your way.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Wait...that wasn't you picking up your kids with a horse? ;)

Don't you feel proud that your apple hasn't fallen far from the tree? Just wait until she gets her own blog... ;)

JennyMac said...

those shoes are made for walkin'

Good luck with super busy schedules!

faemom said...

LOL Kids have a very different reality from ours.

faemom said...

LOL Kids have a very different reality from ours.

WhisperingWriter said...

Silly girl.

I'm grateful we don't do the carpool thing. I just send my kids on the bus.

Nana said...

I am so glad I don't have to do school pick ups anymore.

peewee said...

hmmmmmm, apple doesn't fall far from the tree, eh?

passions and soapboxes said...

Good things can happen in a car. Take advantage of the one on one time with Rachel to talk. You would be surprised what you can learn about your kid while in car pool line.

Congrats. on what you won, what ever it is.

Jenni Jiggety said...

Kids are just a freakin' RIOT some days, aren't they???

Missy said...

I am doing the Schedule Twister too! I have been late to pick up my 11 yr. old for three days straight! I feel terrible, but short of hiring two nannies I have no answers!

Unknown Mami said...

Your daughter needs to write for a sit-com.

Ink said...

Ok, that's a funny line, gotta admit.

But good luck sorting out the schedules. That's GOT to be tough!

naptimewriting said...

You are totally my kind of lady.
"I was hot and cranky and not in the mood for contentment and happiness."
I would laugh, if I hadn't thought this four times already today...

Laoch of Chicago said...

You need some minions to do these important chores for you.

Helene said...

Like I always say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. If it's any consolation, my kids are all smart-asses, thanks to me.

ScoMan said...

You had the perfect opportunity and everything. She gave you the window.

"You know how you can spend some quality time away from the rest of us? Walking home! So long missy!"

LadyFi said...

There might even be a little grain of truth in what she says... Ah, the wisdom and wit of kids, eh?

Zeemaid said...

oh yes, that's what I am waiting for... your girls to get their own blogs... *LOL*

Bill and Lorie Shewbridge said...

That is just too funny... I can't believe you didn't make her walk home. Of course around here, if you did, you'd probably get arrested! :-)